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Enough for Him, whom cherubim, worship night and day,
Breastful of milk, and a mangerful of hay;
Enough for Him, whom angels fall before,
The ox and ass and camel which adore.
When I decided to reflect on “In the Bleak Midwinter” during the season of Advent, I intended to reflect on it through the lens of midlife. So far, I’ve mostly avoided that topic, though I have grazed the surface by thinking about the limitations of our bodies and the finite nature of human life. This week, I can’t escape it any longer. Though I’d rather not think about the reality that I’m middle aged, the truth is there… and it doesn’t have to be scary.
The third stanza of “In the Bleak Midwinter” is the stanza usually omitted by choirs and soloists. This verse is left out of hymnals. I took a look at the two hymnals I have easy access to, and both hymnals chose to omit this stanza of Christina Rosetti’s poem. Why? I have a couple of theories, but both of them boil down to our discomfort with human things. We are afraid, or squeamish, or too prudish to think about the fact that Jesus suckled at his mother’s breast. (If you want to allow yourself to experience what it might have been like for Mary to nurse Jesus, check out this poem by Kaitlyn Hardy Shetler.) When it comes to the story of Christmas, we are more comfortable with talking about angels and babies than we are about the unassisted birth of Jesus to an unwed mother surrounded by farm animals.
I also think this verse gets skipped because, just like me in this Advent series, talking about human, mortal, fleshy stuff leaves us feeling vulnerable. If even the Savior of the world relied on nourishment from his fragile, human mother, we can no longer pretend we are invulnerable ourselves. Yet, in skipping this verse, we don’t allow ourselves to experience the depth of the contrast between enough and not enough that is central to the poem, and we don’t see the thread that leads us to the pinnacle of the final verse. If this human stuff was enough for God, perhaps the gift of our hearts could be enough, too.
Rosetti brilliantly begins the first and third lines with the word “enough,” while also following this powerful word with transcendent realities that surpass anything we could possibly offer to Christ. Somehow, the One who is worshiped day and night by the heavenly realm, the One the angels bow before, received all he needed at the breast of a human mother. Somehow, the One through whom all things were made, exchanged the glory of heaven for the company of livestock. “Holy, holy, holy” was exchanged for the lowing of cattle, the bleats and brays of sheep and donkeys.
Yet, this humble scene was enough.
What does it mean for me to acknowledge “enough” in my life? In my 20s, I focused mostly on what I lacked or what I thought was impossible for me. I lamented that I’d never write a book. I worried if I’d ever find a spouse or friends. I stressed about finding a career that meant something…not just a job, but something more. Now in my 40s, what does it mean for me to find peace and joy in what I have?
Perhaps the quiet moments before anyone else in my house is awake are moments of enough.
Maybe the chill I feel by the drafty window that causes me to pull a blanket around my shoulders is a moment of enough.
If I never write another book, if I mess up the batch of cookies I’m baking, if it’s true that I probably need bifocals…what if these are moments of enough?
I find myself wondering if these moments in which I can no longer run away from the frailty of life are the precise moments in which I might find anew the birth of Christ. He felt the scratchy straw on his tender newborn flesh. He felt the chill of a drafty place to sleep. He knew the sensation of an empty belly, and he knew the fear of hearing a loud, unknown sound for the first time. Yet, he took all of this on and sanctified it. He entered into the struggle and it was enough for him.
Maybe this omitted verse is the key to the whole story, the hinge on which the heavenly and the earthly are joined. And even if we in western churches are too squeamish to sing it, we can’t keep it from being true. The stuff of humanity was enough for him, and that means our stuff is enough for him too.
Lighting the Candle of Joy – Advent, week 3
Reader 1: In verse 3 of “In the Bleak Midwinter,” Christina Rosetti imagines the One worshiped by the angels finding enough at the breast of his mother. As we read this verse, we might feel offended, or a little bit uncomfortable at first. Yet, within these words, something profoundly true presents itself to us.
Reader 2: The Bible does not hide the fact that we are imperfect and we suffer. In 2 Corinthians 12, the apostle Paul is struggling with what he calls a “thorn in the flesh.” He asks God to remove it, but God does not. Paul says that this weakness allows the power of God to shine through. We are imperfect people with imperfect bodies in an imperfect world.
Reader 1: But Psalm 139 also says about our bodies, “For it was you who formed my inward parts;
you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” We are created by God, and we are still imperfect. We have times when we lack things, and yet we still have enough. Jesus is worthy to be worshiped by all of heaven and earth, and yet when he took on flesh and became human, it was enough.
Reader 2: On this third Sunday of Advent, we light the candle of joy (light two purple candles and the rose candle). We find joy because Jesus meets us in our human struggle. He knows what it is like to have needs and to suffer. He understands us and can sympathize with us, and this is good news indeed.
Reader 1: Let us pray. With the candles of hope, peace, and joy before us, we ask that you would fill us with your hope, peace, and joy. We stand in awe of your gift of coming into the world as a helpless child. Meet us where we are, in all the places where we do not feel like enough, and assure us of your presence with us. Help us find our way back to you. In Jesus’s name we pray – Amen.
In the Bleak Midwinter Advent Series
The Premise
Week 1 – Stuck and Still
Week 2 – The Boundless One, Bound for Us